Yesterday, I talked at the end of my post about my Silky Bear and how he isn't doing well. There are some updates now as to what information I have on his health.
This morning we took him to the vet for an ultrasound. We took him first thing knowing the technician would be dropping by at some point during the day and we would just pick him up once he was done. As luck would have it, the technician was also there first thing in the morning, so it we didn't even have to leave him there. The news we received was not as fortunate.
One of his kidneys is larger than the other, which led the vet to believe that he potentially has renal lymphoma. While potentially this is not actually the problem, it is very likely that it is the case. He also has a growth on his shoulder which means it has infiltrated other parts of his body. We were not given an estimate on how much longer he has. To help him eat and be in less pain, he is taking prednisone and an appetite stimulant, but it will not extend his life. For nearly $2,000, we could extend his life for maybe 2 months with chemo. Is it worth it? Probably not. If we choose to only give him prednisone, he might live a normal life until it stops working. We're told that one day, he'll probably stop eating for a couple days in a row at which time we will have to make a decision: put him down or begin chemo or let him suffer. It is not worth so much to get an extra two months, and letting him suffer is definitely out. So it's just a matter of when.
Silky, who has been given many nicknames in his ten, nearly 11 years of life, has been one of my very best friends, my companion, and my constant since I was eight years old. In the time that he's been with me, this huge part Maine Coon mutt, a walking mutton piece with turkey legs for paws, has been a comfort when I have needed him. My fat boy, who has also been mistaken for a raccoon at night, is probably the gentlest cat you'd ever meet. For quite a few years after his rambunctious kitten hood, he would literally come inside (he was an indoor-outdoor cat until he became ill) to eat and sleep. Then he'd go outside and visit the neighbors who had an outdoor cat and left food on their porch. He'd make his rounds around a circle of about four or five houses, each with food left out, poop, then come inside to repeat the cycle.
We'd call him a lazy oaf, because always during the daytime, we'd see him sleeping in various spots including a napkin basket on top of the fridge. When he woke from his cat naps, he'd be ready to go outside again and would sit on a table by the door, looking out the window, meowing every time someone passed as if to say, "Let me out!" If a mailman was there, or the UPS guy, he'd growl, protecting his family and his turf from outsiders. Sometimes, he would sit on a window sill in the kitchen, watching the birds make a nest in the awning. He'd chatter his familiar hunting call, stick his paws up on the window and try to get at them.
When we recently got a kitten, he was such a trooper. He batted the cat away and avoided him, but never was mean or hurt the new kitten. He always was and is patient with my little brother who is six. Even when my little brother is being a toad and won’t leave him alone, Silky is still the most loving and calm cat.
He’s also not afraid to fight to protect those he loves. One night a few months ago, I was reading to my little brother when I heard hissing from outside. I went to check to make sure it wasn’t one of my cats and to make sure if it was one of mine, they weren’t hurt. I saw Silky in a stare-down with another neighboring cat. Knowing my bunny bear’s temperament, I thought my Silky bear was getting bullied; so I went to try to break up the fight and chase off the other cat. What ended up happening was the other cat ran across the street after he saw me walking toward him and my fatty ran after him!
I'm not ready to let him go yet. I don't know that I'll ever be ready. I knew one day I'd have to say goodbye, but I thought I'd have so much more time. Losing such an important member of my family is difficult. This will not be the first time we have dealt with a loss of a family pet either. There have been four before him who have passed. Oreo was long before we had a backyard, but his brother Mr. Cinnamon who passed when I was ten, was given the first of our backyard burials. Oreo and Mr. C were both my grandma's cats. It would be a year later that my mom lost 18 year old Trucker. And just a couple years ago, we lost 22 year old Furfle. Each, except for Oreo, was given a rose bush in the backyard as a replacement for headstones. Each was wrapped in their favorite blanket, the one that they claimed and always slept on. When Silky's time comes, and I suspect it will, much sooner than I'd like to admit, he'll probably get the napkin basket as well as a blanket. He means the world to me and I don't want to let him go.
